pancake-piercing thumbs, and other things which have annoyed me recently

my hands have minerals

My hands are normal. To dry. You know, normal hands, with occasional dryness. So I figured this moisturiser would be perfect for me, until I saw that it is for hands that also have sea minerals. I’m pretty sure mine don’t. Do yours? Wait..that’s weird. How does that even work?  Am I the only person whose hands don’t have sea minerals?

Related: that age-old problem of where to find a dog at short notice in the London Underground.

or else

Because according to this sign, you must be carrying a dog in order to use the escalator.

There are some suggestions on how to reword this sign, but personally I prefer to imagine that there will eventually be dog shops next to the ticket offices in the underground. That way, if you know you’re going to use the escalator, you can buy the requisite dog.

In other news this week, people fry bread and have mutant hands:

She then pierced a hole in the center of the pancake with the back of her thumb

WHAT KIND OF MUTANT PANCAKE-PIERCING THUMB IS THIS??

I’m scared.

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